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Wellbeing is Trending for 2022

“Wellness is the complete integration of body, mind and spirit. The realisation that everything we do, think, feel and believe has an effect on our wellbeing” Greg Anderson.

Covid-19 wins the prize for being the most uncontrollable source of sustained stress in 2021. Just as double vaxxes offered up glimpses of hope for relaxed freedoms, a new variant slid in just in time for NZ’s summer holiday season.

At least there’s always a positive spin off from a global crisis. It’s motivated a desire to increase overall wellbeing in 2022, for ourselves, each other and the planet.

Research tells us that a prolonged pandemic elevates mental health needs, even if we don’t catch the virus. As a team of 5 million, we’ve done pretty well at following health directives, attempting to reduce emotional strain and focusing on what we can control, over what we can’t.

How we live, work, use technology, shop, connect and socialise and how we receive care have all been jiggled around and thought about deeply, unless one has been living under a rock or tin foil hat.

Even though some of us prefer a less overloaded society, not being able to see special people is hard, and sludging through restrictions, super strong opinions, dangerous viewpoints and crazy behaviours can get tiresome. Resilient people are better able to cope with trying circumstances, so increasing wellbeing expands happiness, optimism and meaning in life.

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Categories Addiction, Covid-19, Gratitude, Health, Mindfulness, New beginnings, Save the World, Self-care, Wellbeing

Reaching For Booze & Food in Lockdown?

1 Sep

Photo by **Pavel Danilyuk** from **Pexels**

Usually we know deep within ourselves if what we are reaching for is either good for us or less good!

Do the usual rules and routines feel a bit like they’ve flown out the window in lockdown? And, who is around to hold us accountable? Just because we might be able to wear pyjamas or elastic waist pants, probably doesn’t mean we shouldn’t consider how many calories, and how much fat and sugar might be hiding in tempting treats.

Social media is normalising baking up a storm. Our feeds are full of it. There’s quarantini parties and invitations to join happy hour online. We might have to ask if we want to join the pack, or lead it? Just because everyone is doing it, doesn’t mean we have to. Social media is normalising baking up a storm. Our feeds are full of it. There’s quarantini parties and invitations to join happy hour online. We might have to ask if we want to join the pack, or lead it? Just because everyone is doing it, doesn’t mean we have to. Maybe it’s a better idea to limit or be more conscious of what we’re consuming and be kinder to our immune systems at a time they really need support?

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Tags: Addiction, Covid 19, Dependence, Leanne French Counsellor, lockdown, Mangawhai Counsellor, NZ Relationship Expert, Overindulging in lockdown, telehealth counsellor

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Categories Addiction, Covid-19, Health, Mindfulness, Resilience, Self-care

World Smokefree Day. Let’s Stop Kids From Starting.

31 May

World Smokefree Day, that falls every year on May 31 is a chance to celebrate and work towards Smokefree/auahi kore lives for New Zealanders.

It happens to coincide with the release of a Government proposal in which the Ministry of Health have proposed a ‘grandfather’ policy, to progressively prohibit the sale of smoked tobacco products to a new age group each year. It would gradually increase the age of purchase restrictions by one year every year, so eventually it would be illegal to purchase if you’re under 25. Hooray.

The same proposal wants to limit the level of nicotine in cigarettes and put more investment into smoking cessation services. This is great for our future generation. Ask most smokers when they started, and they’ll say, ‘When I was a kid.’ And none of those kids realised they could get addicted to nicotine within days of first using it. Why? Because when they smoke, the nicotine goes to their brain. In 10 seconds. Straight to the part that controls feelings of pleasure and releases dopamine, a chemical that tricks them into thinking a cigarette equals pleasure. Then within a few minutes, the pleasure is gone, and the craving for a cigarette begins a new cycle.

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Tags: Government Smokefree Proposal, Grandfather tobacco proposal, Leanne French Counsellor, Mangawhai Counsellor, Nicotine addiction, Northland relationship counsellor, Quit smoking, Reduce nicotine proposal NZ, Restrict tobacco sales proposal NZ, Smokefree 2025, telehealth counsellor, Vape to Quit, World Smokefree Day

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Categories Addiction, Counselling, Health, New beginnings, Raising children, Save the World, Vape to Quit

13 Simple Ways to Relieve Overwhelm.

12 May

You can’t calm the storm, so stop trying, What you can do is calm yourself. The storm will pass. Timber Hawkeye.

Overwhelm can arrive when something triggers a powerful emotion in us; especially fear, which can then flood our mind with paralysing negative thoughts and emotions, and change our posture, breath and ability to cope.

It’s really important to be curious about our thought patterns, and to claw back some control because once negative thoughts overly take hold in our mind, they’re likely to distort the severity of our situation and have us focusing on dramatic consequences.

Emotional overwhelm occurs when the intensity of our feelings outmatches our ability to manage them. It can come from a single big stressor, like a pandemic. Or financial issues. Trying to make ends meet is probably number one in the list for tipping many people over the edge. Others find that overwhelm sweeps in like a tidal wave, brought on from a bunch of challenges like life transitions and losses that come at us one after the other.

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Tags: grief, Leanne French Counsellor, loss, Mangawhai Counsellor, money struggles, Northland relationship counsellor, overwhelm, pandemic, self soothe, stress, telehealth counsellor, transition

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Categories Counselling, Covid-19, Health, Mindfulness, New beginnings, Self-care

Surviving Love in Lockdown. 10 Top Relationship Tips.

8 May

What if you’ve discovered you’re not one of those resilient couples, sheltering in place, strengthening bonds, feeling loved up and loving it? What if your version has been six hideous weeks of groundhog day in inescapable confinement, filled with endless stress, brick wall arguments, unworkable arrangements and mind-numbing chores? If you’re desperate to burst your bubble and run for the hills, don’t add to the pessimistic divorce and break-up statistics, these are extraordinary circumstances.

Uncertainty spews forth a range of challenges, from financial pressures to burdens like working from home while also caring full time for children. Take away all the welcome distractions that used to exist in life before Covid, and you’ve got a source of tension even in the strongest of relationships.

For relationships cracking at the seams, although it may feel hopeless, it doesn’t have to be. Why not reframe it? Think of it as a fast track opportunity for growth because adversity Continue reading →

Tags: 10 top relationship tips, 10 top tips to survive love in lockdown, covid19, covid19 and relationships, how to emotionally manage isolation, how to make sure your relationship survives lockdown, how to strengthen your relationship, Leanne French Counsellor, love in lockdown, Mangawhai Counsellor, Northland relationship counsellor, NZ Relationship Expert, relationship expert, restrictions strain relationships, telehealth counsellor

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Categories Communication, Conflict resolution, Counselling, Covid-19, Kindness, Relationship advice

Tend and Cherish.

27 Apr

As the sorrow of sickness and silence spread, the stop sign rose and asked us to sit, together but apart, to be guests of nature and lend our ears to the birdsong, chirping crickets and intuition, instead of the usual roar of engines and economic hum.

We were asked to sit until remorse replaced restlessness so we could thrust aside mountainous obsessions of waste, and refuse to be swallowed up by inexhaustible convenience, coveted commodities and take aways that take away deeper nourishment, and to wait for the rise of bread, instead.

Sit they said, with blinders off as industry cools and hearts and homes are warmed. Wait until expectation is traded for appreciation so it becomes easier to undertake a scaled back, survival stock take, where love and local livelihood is supported and we embrace the significant and sustainable.

Sit and replace swelling fears of toils and troubles with soap and bubbles. Then with lion heart courage, forge forward, with fragility, onto the path of goodwill, into a morally determined destiny and consciously cultivate kindness for all of us endangered ones, here upon our enchanted earth.

Poem Tend & Cherish by Leanne French as I contemplate the last day of Level 4 Lockdown in New Zealand and somewhat lament the loss of the quietest earth day experienced in my lifetime.

Thanks so much to my beloved husband Wolfie for the fabulous daily graphics he’s made for me.

Tags: climate emergency, contemplating the end of level 4 lockdown, corona virus, covid19, Leanne French Counsellor, Mangawhai Counsellor, Northland relationship counsellor, NZ Relationship Expert, poem, poetry, save the earth, telehealth counsellor, tend and cherish

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Categories Compassion, Covid-19, Gratitude, Kindness, Mindfulness, New beginnings, Save the World

Let’s All Be Better Humans.

26 Apr

Beyond thinking about how to stop microbe movement and economic downfalls, will we also think more about respect and empathy? Can we create a new vision of a better world, for ourselves, our community, our environment and for our beautiful earth? My hope is that we will mindfully pay more attention to the wee glimpses we have of a future where we know what we want and need, and then work towards making many tiny incremental changes so all creatures can flourish. Let’s make our future ancestors proud.

Tags: Leanne French Counsellor, let's all be better humans, Mangawhai Counsellor, NZ Relationship Expert, Save the World, telehealth counsellor

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Categories Compassion, Counselling, Covid-19, Health, Kindness, Mindfulness, New beginnings, Save the World

Same Storm. Different Boat.

22 Apr

While Mahatma Gandhi once said Dignity of human nature requires that we must face the storms of life, this present storm, the way we face it and the impact it will have on each and every one of us, will be incredibly diverse.

In the midst of disruption, there are commonalities. Heightened reactions, moments of confusion and clarity, and concern for safety and security. Human nature dictates we do what we can to save ourselves and then look around to offer a (socially distanced) helping hand.

We react in a thousand different ways because how we think, feel, act, need, want, hate, love and believe, stem from a huge variety of factors from our past experience, our resilience, the extent of support we have available, the size of our bank account, to where we’re positioned physically, socially, economically and emotionally.

While some may have anchored calmly, and others adjusted their sails towards rainbows and pots of gold, we cannot underestimate the emotional gale and financial swirl that this storm has brought upon many. Continue reading →

Tags: acts of kindness, Compassion, corona virus emotional wellbeing, covid19, Hope, Kindness, Leanne French Counsellor, making judgements, Mangawhai Counsellor, Northland relationship counsellor, Same storm different boats, storms, telehealth counsellor, Therapy, tolerance

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Categories Compassion, Conflict resolution, Covid-19, Health, Kindness, New beginnings, Resilience, Save the World, Self-care, Self-love

Ignite Hope.

31 Mar

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Hope and fear cannot occupy the same space – Maya Angelou

Hope is allowing ourselves a peek into a positive future. It’s about expecting and desiring that this will work out. It’s about believing that good things really do happen. It’s about remembering that magic exists, beauty surrounds us, and miracles are possible.

Hope lends us slivers of happiness which uplift us and make difficult situations easier to bear. Hope grows into optimism which encourages a positive belief that we really do have the inner power and strength to step into the unknown.

All the things we do for ourselves or with our children that are prevention measures, show we’re in control and can solve problems. When we’re proud of washing hands and wiping things down, when we celebrate covering our nose and mouth with a tissue or elbow when we cough or sneeze, when we follow the rules, we shoo away feelings of helplessness. Continue reading →

Tags: covid19, goodness influencer, how to emotionally manage isolation, ignite hope, keep hope alive, Leanne French Counsellor, therapist, why hope is important

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Categories Counselling, Covid-19, Health, Kindness, Save the World, Self-care

Tend and Befriend. Why Being Kind to Yourself Matters.

29 Mar

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Think of the last time someone criticized you, put you down, expressed disapproval or treated you poorly. Don’t linger on it though, because chances are it wasn’t very motivational or uplifting. Why? Because it’s demoralizing, elevates stress hormones, increases emotional reactivity, robs us of peace of mind and greatly reduces the quality of our day.

How dare they right? Well, how dare we do it to ourselves either! It’s like choosing a punishment over a reward.

In this unprecedented time we may have a lot more time by ourselves and Continue reading →

Tags: be kind to yourself, covid19, goodness influencer, how to manage isolation, Kindness, Leanne French Counsellor, tend and befriend, therapist, why being kind to yourself matters