Mindfulness | Leanne French Relationship Expert & Counsellor

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Tame Your Thoughts.

Right now, more than ever, there are a lot of people experiencing turbulent thoughts that they describe as “having a hold over them.”

Our usual thoughts keep us pretty busy as it is, but lately it’s the catastrophic thoughts of future scenarios that appear to be running wild, egging on restlessness, confusion and anxiety.

Here’s what I want you to know. Thoughts may seem like they come from outside of us, but they actually come from inside us. We’re in control of what we think. Let’s not give thoughts a power that they don’t have. Thoughts don’t choose us. We choose them.

A situation in itself doesn’t create overwhelm or panic, only your thoughts about Continue reading →

Tags: catastrophizing, corona virus emotional wellbeing, covid19, goodness influencer, how to emotionally manage isolation, how to stop overthinking, overthinking, overwhelm, reducing anxiety, taming thoughts, therapist, thinking and feeling

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Categories Counselling, Covid-19, Health, Mindfulness, Save the World, Self-care

Calm is a Superpower.

9 Apr

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If someone is baiting you to argue, don’t take the hook. Swim around and find a calm, creative response rather than a reaction. Leanne French. Secret 59 from Fairytale Love – How to Love Happily Ever After.

Someone’s got to do it, so why not you?

Don’t jump to the conclusion that what’s going on has to be about you.
Stay focused on content that makes sense, and try to ignore emotional outbursts.
Be willing to check whether they are stressed or tired, and ask how you could make things better.
Change the mood of the conversation and trick them into escaping.

We control how we respond.

When we take our time to go within we can respond to the same event with annoyance or anger, or we can search for a more thoughtful way to respond with peace and calmness. Continue reading →

Tags: calm is a superpower, Covid-19, goodness influencer, how to avoid arguments, how to emotionally manage isolation, reducing conflict, therapist

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Categories Conflict resolution, Counselling, Covid-19, Health, Mindfulness, Raising children, Relationship advice, Save the World, Self-care

Dig Deep.

6 Apr

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Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. Victor Frankl.

While I’m not asking you to carefully craft all of your conversations, if you’re finding it challenging being confined in closer circumstances for longer periods of time than you are used to, and conflict is causing concern, it could be beneficial to learn how to respond rather than react. Especially if you want to create a more emotionally comforting bubble to hang out in.

Choosing our response is about making sure it’s calm, considered, conscious and in line with our core values. It’s driven by wanting to get the best out of a situation for ourselves and others. Responding is more about actively taking our time to work out what Continue reading →

Tags: Choosing how we respond in a crisis, communication in confinement, corona virus emotional wellbeing, covid19, goodness influencer, Relationship rescue, Respond rather than react, therapist

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Categories Communication, Compassion, Conflict resolution, Counselling, Covid-19, Health, Kindness, Mindfulness, Relationship advice, Save the World, Self-care

Rest. Relax. Recharge.

5 Apr

If we want to live a wholehearted life, we have to become intentional about cultivating rest and play, and we must work to let go of exhaustion as a status symbol and productivity as self worth. Brene Brown.

Rest is when we shift from deliberate and effort filled thinking, to a more effortless, playful, peaceful, aimless wandering and daydreaming state.

Rest lowers our heart rate, stress and shoulders.

One of the most interesting things about rest is that it’s usually about carving out a wee chunk of solitary time, versus relaxing, which is able to be done in the Continue reading →

Tags: caring for yourself in lockdown, corona virus emotional wellbeing, covid19, goodness influencer, how to manage isolation, rest, restoring balance, therapist

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Categories Covid-19, Health, Mindfulness, Self-care, Self-love

Create Calm.

1 Apr

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It’s one of our basic needs, the need for security, which is triggering fear in many people. Although many things are out of our control, we need to keep working at reducing and releasing fear, panic and anxiety because it over activates our flight-or-fight mode. When we are in what I call Meerkat Mode, our body wants to take constant action. Because present circumstances make that a bit restrictive, it’s possible that the tension that builds as a result of being ready to pounce on problems begins to physically hurt a little. It could also be the reason that people are getting ants in their pants and pushing the boundaries of their bubbles.

Calming our mind and soothing our system is not a luxury thing to do, it’s vital. It Continue reading →

Tags: body scan meditation, Calm, chill out, covid19, create calm, goodness influencer, how to calm children about the corona virus, how to emotionally manage isolation, jon kabit zinn, Meditation, Mindfulness, therapist

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Categories Counselling, Covid-19, Health, Mindfulness, Self-care

Inhale Courage. Exhale Fear.

30 Mar

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If posts about people cleaning cupboards, doing yoga, crafting, making preserves and cookies is causing you to worry or panic that you’re not in that “positive” space, breathe low and slow, and know that you are not alone. This isn’t a sprint to a predetermined finish line, it’s a marathon and we are all in it together.

Covid-19 has changed how the world works. It’s ok to pause and it’s more than ok to be experiencing grief (whether we recognize it or not) because the new reality is that there are people all over the globe that are sick or afraid of becoming sick. They have Continue reading →

Tags: courage, covid19, fear and anxiety, goodness influencer, how to breathe properly, how to emotionally manage isolation, hyperventilation syndrome, therapist

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Categories Covid-19, Health, Mindfulness, Save the World, Self-care

One Day at a Time.

28 Mar

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It’s no wonder that Alcoholics Anonymous emphasize taking things one day at a time, because it helps make difficult changes more manageable.

Feeds are full of how to fill our time, even though some people might be run of their feet busier than usual, but what if you’re still in shock? Or, like me, feeling overwhelmed by the seriousness, not of the illness or isolation as such, but about our future after all of this, which today suddenly felt completely uncertain and a little bleak.

So here’s the thing. Uncertainty involving all-encompassing questions about the meaning and purpose of life and one’s place in the world in the future has an actual name. It’s known as Continue reading →

Tags: anxiety, covid19, existential anxiety, goodness influencer, how to manage isolation, Leanne French Counsellor, Mindfulness, overwhelm, therapist

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Categories Addiction, Counselling, Covid-19, Mindfulness, Self-care

Wherever You Go, There You Are.

27 Mar

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The government have asked for our support to protect New Zealand and eradicate COVID-19. An important restriction has been put in place, stay home, save lives and no surprises, two days in and the usual suspects have gone a little wild, flaunting the rules and looking for loopholes.

We often hope that others will think, behave, react and respond the way we do, but it doesn’t always work that way. Some of the rules are bound to get a little tighter when people who don’t like to be told what to do, go about their business, their way. They are just being who they are, but when the consequences affect the collective, it Continue reading →

Tags: covid19, goodness influencer, Jon Kabat Zinn, Leanne French Counsellor, lockdown, self isolation, stay in the bubble, therapist

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Categories Communication, Counselling, Covid-19, Health, Mindfulness

Ease into Uncertainty.

26 Mar

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Our NZ government declared a State of Emergency, and our current COVID-19 Alert Level is Level 4 also known as lockdown which is in place for four weeks or more. In summary, this means

Everyone must now stay home, except those providing essential services.
Only make physical contact with those that you live with.

It’s a normal, universal feeling to feel fear when faced with the unknown. As our news feeds fill with all kinds of stories, real, fake and funny, the reality is that 738 people died in one day in Spain yesterday, and 683 in Italy. It is vital that we all do our best to stick to the rules put in place to save lives and flatten the curve. The more careful we are, the sooner this thing will be over.

As a therapist, relationship expert and goodness influencer with 30 years of experience I’m here to help ease the possible psychological effects of these times. One of the first things to know is Continue reading →

Tags: covid19, goodness influencer, grief, how to emotionally manage isolation, Leanne French Counsellor, lockdown, therapist, uncertainty

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Categories Counselling, Covid-19, Health, Mindfulness, Save the World, Self-care

Eco-Grief & Eco-Anxiety. Help For A New Reality.

12 Jan

Eco-grief is the grief felt in response to experienced or anticipated ecological loss. Eco-anxiety is a chronic fear of environmental doom. Creeping environmental changes are now cascading ahead at a catastrophic pace and have been rightly upgraded to a climate emergency.

When our senses are inundated with a torrent of news, filled with the horror and sadness of global disasters, sensitive people begin to wobble and topple.

Scientists are telling us “like it is.” We need to listen. Dire warnings, horrific natural disasters, death, displaced people, species extinction, rising seas, soaring temperatures, extreme drought, diminished air quality, degradation of waterways and raging bushfires destroying trees, homes, animals, people and even those saving the Continue reading →

Tags: Australian fires, be the change, climate change, climate emergency, eco-anxiety, eco-grief, empathy, Leanne French Counsellor, Planet Earth, Save the World, Take action, therapist