Getting Out Of Groundhog Day.

18 Jul

Exhaustion sucks. It can rob us of our ability to smile, to have fun, to negotiate nicely, or it can invite us into overly sensitive states, the kind where “what about me” blaming, finger-pointing and managing our moods and responses becomes so much more difficult.

It takes courage to ask for help when things feel a little out of control, or when you’re stuck in a rut and life seems a bit hum drum or boring. It’s hard to say you’re

not coping if you aren’t comfortable with vulnerability. Not managing is so easily brought on by things like lack of sleep, disruption of self-care and decreased inspiration, stimulation and support. For some there’s piles of washing and loads of extra work that comes with having a family. All kinds of demands, even a job filled with endless pressure and a commute that steals hours from your day can eventually squeeze the living daylights out of you. What’s left at the end of every full on day like this? Zombies? Guilty people who wish they could just connect a bit more? Or very tired people, people who may feel they would rather be given to, than muster up the energy to give?

There in lies the rub. Whoever you were before the exhaustion and whatever you contributed back then is going to sorely missed. The ones that love you will want it back and unless they are brave they probably won’t tell you directly. The direct route to get, is to give. It’s about rearranging the bits of life you can, and doing a few things differently, so you can actually recreate snippets of that self again and muster up some old fun, silly, romantic, creative, caring ways so that slowly but surely you breathe life back into your world.

Move away from asking what do I need, and instead think what could I offer?

What one thing could I contribute to my exhausted couch-potato that could possibly inflate or inspire them.

What would it take for me to choose interesting and different responses to prickly conversations?

When you love through the tiredness, you hearten and raise spirits. That in turn allows others to see the sparkle in you and the light within themselves. They get to trust they have a back up person, someone who uplifts and inspires and lightens the load. And then magically, before all hope is lost, your day will feel different as they become someone who strengthens and sustains you.